Womens English Funny Jokes

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Women's English

"Yes" = No

"No" = Yes

"Maybe" = No

"I'm sorry" = You'll be sorry

"We need" = I want

"It's your decision" = The correctdecision should be obvious by now

"Sure... go ahead"  = I don'twant you to

"I'm not upset"  = Of courseI'm upset, you moron!

"We need to talk"  = I needto complain

"You're certainly attentivetonight"  = Is sex all you ever think about?

"Be romantic, turn out the lights"= I have flabby thighs

"This kitchen is so inconvenient"  = I want a new house

"I want new curtains"  = andcarpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper...

"I heard a noise"  = Inoticed you were almost asleep

"Do you love me?"  = I'm going to ask for something expensive

"How much do you love me?"  =I did something today you're really not going to like

"I'll be ready in a minute"  = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

"Is my butt fat?"  = Lie to me

"You have to learn tocommunicate"  = Just agree with me

"Are you listening to me!?"  = [Too late, you're dead]

"Do what you want."  = You'llpay for this later